Giving Your Best Life
Join Stephanie Jones aka Giving Gal, as she chats about “Giving Your Best Life"! In each episode, she shares intentional ways to give to yourself and others, how giving and gratitude changes your life and ways to go after living your big dreams and accomplishing goals.
Giving Your Best Life
Episode 108: Co-Host Zach Lloyd's Personal Story: From Despair to Hope: A Journey of Transformation and the Power of Gratitude
Sometimes the most turbulent waters reveal the pearls of our deepest transformations. In a heartfelt exchange on our latest podcast, Zach Lloyd, a beacon of hope whose story punctuates my book "The Gratitude Challenge," opens up about his life's rough patches that ultimately sculpted the man he is today. Together, we navigate the emotions of the past—bullying, heartbreak, substance abuse—and how these shared experiences, raw and unfiltered, have shaped our dedication to fitness, faith, and helping others find their way through the dark.
As you listen, you'll be moved by Zach's harrowing journey from the brink of despair to the strength he found in the most unexpected of places. His encounter with near-death experiences and drug dealing, followed by a pivotal life-saving call, exemplifies the incredible impact of human connection and the undying hope that lives within us all. It's not just our struggles that define us, but also our capacity to rise, to rehabilitate, and to discover new directions. We're here to show you that no matter how deep the valley, the climb to the summit is within reach.
This episode isn't just about overcoming—it's about the transformative power of giving. I share how serving those in need, those who the Bible refers to as 'the least of these,' has not only alleviated my own battles with depression but has filled my life with a joy that transcends the ordinary. We invite you to find solace and inspiration in our narratives, and we challenge you to embrace the cycle of compassion and thankfulness. Your story, like ours, holds the potential to uplift and guide others towards a life where gratitude isn't just a practice, but a lifeline.
Connect with Zach:
Zach's website here
Get a free resource: End Calorie Counting Toolkit here
Follow Zach on IG: @zachlloydcoaching
Connect with Stephanie:
Get a free resource The 4G Method Journal here.
Shop Stephanie's books here.
Follow me on IG: @Giving_Gal or FB/GivingGal
Hey friends, it's Stephanie here with Giving your Best Life Podcast, and my friend.
Speaker 2:Zach Lloyd sustainable anti-diet coach.
Speaker 1:Wonderful, and today we're going to talk about being uncomfortable because Zach is going to be very uncomfortable with the topic that we're talking today, but sometimes in life we have to do things that we're uncomfortable with. So Zach has been a guest on the podcast. I just see now you're like the co-host every other episode because he is coming on here and just as like a reminder of why.
Speaker 2:Zach's here.
Speaker 1:I would love for you to share why you think you're here, but for me it's like this is our health and wellness. What we eat what we put into our body, like taking care of ourselves it is a big part of giving your best life, because if you don't have your health, you don't have anything, anything else to share. Yeah, I mean, that sums it up 100, perfect.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we're on the same page. How do you give your best life if you're not healthy or on a on a sustainable path to get get healthy? Great um.
Speaker 1:so, anyways, I want to back up a little bit and talk about um, like how I really got to know zach on a different level and he has an amazing story that I would love for him to share with my audience. But um and we've been friends for a while. We actually talked today it was seven years since we met. Because he didn't get to the day on april 1st, uh, because I had done an interview on a podcast that he was working on, the Giving Challenge, and so on my next book, the Gratitude Challenge, I had been working out with Zach. He was my coach and as I'm writing this book, I was collecting stories from other people. So most of the stories in the book are mine, but a few are not, and so I just see now, zach, use gratitude around the gym and even online. You seem very happy, very grateful. Do you want to talk a little bit about that, like what I saw from the outside, not knowing your story?
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, what did you see from the outside?
Speaker 1:This like you're always very happy, you like?
Speaker 2:yeah, I mean, I truly am passionate about working out, lifting weights, however you want to put it, not just weights, just getting active like just being active, like living in indiana is very hard for me sometimes because I like to be in the mountains so much and being active in the mountains and any different season doesn't matter that just truly fuels me. But the passion to just be moving is is huge in my life, right?
Speaker 1:so I think that's kind of weird, yeah, and like we would work out at six in the morning and I would just show up and I don't know. I just was like, wow, this guy, he's got it. So can you write something about gratitude and how you're? You just seem happy and so he, he says yes to writing, but when he sends it to me it is his story. That I had no idea. Yeah, like I remember one I was so grateful that you felt like you could trust me with your story. Um, but then I was like what do I do with this? And we even talked like it made it into the book, so the gratitude challenge, zach's story's in there. But even up till I think I was getting ready to print, you weren't for sure if you wanted me to print it yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So I said I remember that. I remember the very moment I sat down to write it and I was like, oh great, this is going to be tough. Like what do I even write about related to gratitude and and just you know, staring at the computer for a while then something started coming out and then it was one of those few times in my life where I feel like it was just a download from God. It was the Holy Spirit just told me what to write and it wasn't really me writing it. And then, after I had written it, I looked down like this is pretty personable, personal, vulnerable, um, and out of my comfort zone. But I've again. I had no idea what I was going to write that day. It just happened, and so I turned it into you and said this is what I got. What do you want to?
Speaker 1:do with it. Yeah, I remember we meeting and like talking over.
Speaker 1:I think I probably cried a little bit because I I just didn't know, and I think it's a good um like topic of you never know what people's lives are. You never know what they're going through. Like I was viewing Zach through our 6am sessions. He's got energy, he always seems happy, he seems grateful. That was the surface. That's what I asked him to write about. And then I read your story and I'm like, wow, we never know what people have gone through, their struggles, how they got to where they are. So, um, that to touch on that.
Speaker 2:how you perceive me is very fascinating to me, so cause it's weird if I say it, but the fact that you just said it I can hit on it. So you said you perceive me as energetic, uh, like upbeat, what was that? Yeah, like happy, happy, yeah, okay. So I get that a lot right, and especially on like a lot of the videos I do. I get that a lot because my videos are like that, they're high energy. I'm not like that all day, thank goodness. My wife is very thankful for that.
Speaker 2:But, um, part part of that is because I have been so hopeless and miserable in my past that I really value.
Speaker 2:And this is not like a day-to-day thing where I think about all the time like or else I wouldn't be human Right, but like, if I really step back and think about why I do what I do, it's because of that, because I know how dark this world can get and bring you down and get to the point of like pure hopelessness, and so that's one reason why I really am so passionate about what I do is because whoever is on the other end of the video or the conversation that I'm having, like I believe in you so much because I am not special by any means at all in the slightest bit, if anything, I'm below average. I really feel that and if I can get out of that dark hole than anybody can and again, it wasn't me doing it like working out was part of it, yada, yada, yada, but ultimately it was by god's grace alone, right and all of us have that, so that's kind of why I do it yeah.
Speaker 1:So we've been dancing around like the dark hole, but you do have a story that, I think, does give other people hope, because they do look at you. Whether you like it or not, they look at you, know, like look at it, I mean you have it or not. They look at you and they're like look at Zach, I mean you have an amazing life, a beautiful wife, like the best wife. I love your wife. You have beautiful kids, and people can look at your life and go, oh, zach has a perfect life. And actually, though, like you said, god saved you. I feel like his hand came down, saved your life, and I want people to hear that. So, if you're listening to us, rip, or you see us on social media and you're like look at you, two perfect people, it's like, no, look what God has done. So do you want to? Yeah, for sure?
Speaker 2:So, yeah, I'll kind of just long story short. And then you asked you say if I skip over it, okay, um, during middle school and high school I was bullied a lot and that really played a part into my high school experience as it got progressively worse and the way that I kind of looked at myself and like a best friend at the time supposedly best friend just kind of like ended up siding with the bullies again long story short and then like treating me in such a terrible way and then aligned with them and I thought he was my best friend so there's like betrayal is all that typical high school stuff.
Speaker 2:It feels like relatively typical the way that.
Speaker 2:I handled it though, was not talking to anybody, not reaching out to anybody, not asking for help, not telling anybody how I feel that was the last thing I would do is tell them the outfield.
Speaker 2:It was like, you know, kind of think until you make it situation, and then I kind of I start experimenting with kind of like drugs till you make it situation, and then, um, I kind of I start, um, experimenting with kind of like drugs and alcohol a little bit, and then I start to find this group of people that are a lot like me, where they're kind of like on the outskirts of the normal, like high school kids, and what I mean by that is like really like they just marched to their own beat and they did not care what other people thought of them, and somehow, one way or another, I started becoming friends with one of them, and then it became a group, and then, all of a sudden, it's like this is awesome, because, like I can say screw you to everybody that didn't like me or bullied me.
Speaker 2:And then I have a like-minded individuals that feel the same way about pretty much everything, and that's where we could just kind of cause destruction in our own ways, and whatever that turned into, and then, slowly but surely, over the next couple years, as I graduated high school, after, you know, trying different drugs here or there, um, I became, uh, hooked on oxycontin and I had a lot of friends, same thing. And one day is before I was saved, um, I was driving my car and I just I knew that if I kept going down that road, it's just one of those weird moments where I was having such a bad morning because I was so hungover from oxycontin the night before, and and I just I knew that I had to make a change. And it's funny because, like god saved me, I was having such a bad morning because I was so hungover from Oxycontin the night before and the night before, and I just I knew that I had to make a change.
Speaker 1:And it's funny because, like God saved me through an Eminem song which is like you know, like that's how God works, I think that's a book title, yeah right.
Speaker 2:And so it's not afraid. And in the rap, like Eminem talks about not being afraid and to like stand up to your demons, whether they're like in front of you or the inner demons. And ultimately that moment I wasn't saved. But looking back, that was a spiritual moment for me because I never went back to Oxycontin after that day and talked to anybody that's been hooked on any type of drug like that, like you don't just give it up in one day. And yeah, there was like the side effects and stuff like that. But I got through that and a huge part of that was also working out, and working out ended up becoming that new drug for me in a healthier way. But I had to deal with that down the road later. That's another story. But long story short.
Speaker 2:A little before that in high school, my girlfriend at the time breaks up with me and it wasn't sadness about her breaking up with me, it was because I was a terrible boyfriend, I was just a. I mean, how could I be a good boyfriend in any way, shape or form? It was more about control, all about control, and I had been messing around with her for so long and she finally had enough, like about time. And when she finally had enough, I realized I had no more control in my life. Like that was the last thing I felt like I had control over was her, and like a messed up way, obviously right. And so I was like what, what am I doing with my life? Like, what do I? Got going for me, you know, I was supposed to go to university of oregon and be a duck and, like, have a college experience and I've always been super, you know, book smart or whatever, get good grades, yada, yada. Like that was not the path that was turning out for me.
Speaker 2:And I found myself in my car at the time and I had a Glock 45, which I was using to sell drugs with but only part of the story, fun fact and I was not like one of those people who was looking for a reason to use it, but I had it because I was willing to use it and ultimately I turned it on myself and in the book it talks a little more about that and, um, in the book talks a little more about that.
Speaker 2:But essentially, um, I my, my phone rings and there's no reason I was going to answer that phone for anybody at the point, because I was just going to go through with it, um, but I did happen to glance at it and it was my sister calling and that was the only person I was going to answer that phone for. Um, for a lot of different reasons, but she has struggled in so many different. She's my older sister and she was the one that told me try things out, you're going to be a kid, go for it, but don't ever do heroin or meth, because you'll probably lose your life that way. Those things are really hard to kick.
Speaker 2:For whatever reason I never went down that route. Oxycontin is actually I don't like the term gateway drug. I had a lot of friends, though, that ended up doing heroin because they couldn't afford Oxy anymore and just ruined their lives. And so, for long story short again, like my sister answered that phone call and she just changed my mindset. It was like, oh, like, there's somebody that cares about me and so I didn't go through with it obviously, and so that's kind of the yeah that's what you tell in the book was you're grateful for a phone call.
Speaker 2:Right, just that one.
Speaker 1:thing that stopped you and you know it changed your mindset, which I'm grateful for that phone call and I'm grateful for you sharing the story.
Speaker 1:You know, like our goal with all this is that maybe there's one person or there's somebody that you're you're listening to this and you're like, wow, I know this kid that's going through a really hard time this. And you're like, wow, I know this kid that's going through a really hard time, like share zach's story. And then you know like, maybe that will be his or her one thing. Yeah, um, also too is didn't you get arrested or end up in jail? Yeah, I got some of that too. Like, yeah, you've got layers, it wasn't. And I don't want to say just like, oh, yeah, you were just on Oxy or you were just drinking, like there are so many layers and talk about, like how you used working out and how you feel like God got you from going to. You know this kid who was on drugs dealing drugs almost commit suicide to like you going and turning on another path yeah, yeah, I think.
Speaker 2:So there was like the the obvious things that I think are very important to highlight but that seem obvious that may not be, is like I was working out, because a friend of mine was working out and it was like you get muscles when you're a younger guy and then you get girls like that's the, the easy math, right. So but also it was the way you started feeling and then I felt better.
Speaker 1:And I was like, oh, this is like, this is fun, but it's also something that I'm going to get other things out of right.
Speaker 2:So, and then, over time, I realized it was rewiring my brain to handle suffering, essentially oh, interesting, and because it's like once you start pushing into reps or pushing into running however you want to look at it right it's like you realize that you have a power to override that desire to quit or stop.
Speaker 2:And once you override that quitting or stopping a couple times, you're like, wow, that felt good. I feel like a different person now. And that happened enough over a couple years that I realized that I wasn't a victim to my circumstances, which was easy for me to go down that road, cause I was like I basically messed up my life and like for most younger people, if you don't get like high school or college right, and then like your life's done, yeah, like that's kind of the overall, like that's how important adults make you feel about those like four to eight years of your life, and that's something to keep aware of too, because that that feeling is very real and it affects the way young people think. Um, so long story short, that that workout, you see how like it changes the neurology in my mind and then all of a sudden I'm not as much of a victim and I'm starting to become more of a go-getter, more ambitious to do things um, and that's kind of the spark.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's interesting you say that is like this mentality of you know high school, college. If you don't do this, I always thought if I gave a like graduation or a high school commencement or something like that, it is around that aspect, because I think in high school, especially in high school, you can get labeled. Certain, like you were even talking about, we were this group of guys, we were on the outskirts, we had bullies, but there was probably a label around and then that's who defined you. Somebody else has defined you. And to always say, like there's a start over point, you can always start over.
Speaker 1:So whatever defined you in school, maybe you didn't make good grades, maybe you didn't work hard, maybe you weren't an app, whatever it was, maybe you were the bully, like, whatever that is is tomorrow you can choose to do something else. And that's what I love about your story was like you were in this victim mindset. You were turning to other things that we're not filling any hole, helping you, but then you made a different choice and the compound effect of that different choice, over and over again, led you to the life that you have today yeah, and there was plenty of failure.
Speaker 2:It was just like keep trying, yeah, and I think that's one thing I do with my coaching class. It's like really drive that home. And we talk about the brushing the teeth analogy, but it's so true, it's like brush one tooth today, or, sorry, floss one tooth today and then you'll end up flossing all your teeth in the next year, probably. Right, that's how it works and we're wired that way. And once you can get rid of like the, the shame, and then also like the negative bias that we have just as human beings, because that we're all like that, like we're wired that way, so you just knowing that is helpful and then saying, okay, I did do something today that's going to make me better, no matter how small it is, stop measuring it.
Speaker 2:It's just that one thing over time really does compound.
Speaker 1:Yeah, um, so many good points, and I want to thank you for sharing your story, because I always know how difficult it is for you, but I do believe that, um, it will help somebody. Even if it helps one person, anything else that you want to like wrap wrap up with, or a final thought.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think my story is kind of like one of those more extreme stories. My wife's testimony is nowhere near as extreme as mine and I've heard people like my wife that don't have as extreme testimonies be like well, I just don't feel like I have. There's always a story there and that's important and it does not need to be extreme. And, trust me, if I could change, I would not have an extreme story like that. But for the people that don't have anything extreme going on in your life, I really challenge you even more because you are sitting somewhere between contentment and well, you're just sitting in contentment if you're just kind of not pursuing something in a way that you know is directed from God, essentially Right, and I hope that you, out of the most, really feel pull, because there is something whispering in your ear telling you what the next thing to do is, and it probably has nothing to do with yourself, it's probably fully selfless and that's how you know you're going down the right road. And I'll finish with a quick story. I can't remember his name.
Speaker 2:The guy on shark tank that's on there a lot. He major depression, something. I've struggled a lot, a lot over the years and for whatever reason. He ended up going to a soup kitchen and volunteering. He didn't have any money problem. He had everything in the world but major depression. He ended up volunteering for a couple weeks and it completely changed his life and then he didn't have depression anymore over a couple weeks, when they were happy to clinically declare him extremely depressed, give him medication, need therapy, all the stuff. But service was the thing that pulled him out and I think all of us again are bent in towards ourselves, me especially.
Speaker 2:And the moment you can start looking out what you can do for other people. It's funny how it works, because it will end up blessing you more.
Speaker 1:Yeah, 100%. I mean I love how you wrapped it up. Although I'm the giving gal, I give a gift every day, so I want to put one caveat on. It is yes, if you need therapy, a doctor, if you're struggling with deep depression.
Speaker 1:If you need help, go get that. But I have seen that over and over again. I mean there is science and research behind volunteerism. Giving your acts of kindness, like it, physically does something to your brain, and that's what I mean. I was in a depression when I started my giving journey and I say that's how I got like now. I have very few days that I am depressed, but it was because every day I was focusing on me, one person.
Speaker 1:How can I make a difference in one other person's life? I was getting that hit and you're like, oh my gosh, this is great. Or you go serve. And then when you go serve, so you take this person who is very wealthy, has everything, and then you go serve the least of these which the Bible tells us. You know serving the least of these, those in prison, the widows, the orphans. When you do that, then you realize like, oh my gosh, I have so much to be grateful for. And it's like this circle of giving and getting outside of yourself. And if you do that in the realm of where God is calling us to give and serve, then you can become grateful for what you've got and then you can give more and it just like it just keeps going. So I love that.
Speaker 1:What a great way to wrap up. Thank you so much, and all these ways I appreciate, zach. So one tell your story, because it's always going to impact somebody, and this is just another way that you can get to giving your best life.